Keeping it real and Keeping it positive.

Change…. The one Constant you can Depend on..Phase 1.

It’s that time again when we pack up boxes and head to a new adventure. I wanted to share some thoughts during this transition period that will give you a window in to my emotions during this time, some lessons learned and also perhaps help some of you out there who struggle with change.

A long time ago I learned that change is not a bad thing. Change is a constant and without it we would become stagnant. Growth requires change. We never stay the way we ‘used to be’ and neither does much of anything else. I’ve always been someone who not only embraces change but even looks forward to it, but that doesn’t mean that it isn’t hard especially when it involves saying good bye. I’m just happy that we are doing this move in phases so I have several more months before I have to deal with GOOD BYES.

For Barry and I this will be our 30th move to a new address in our 43 years of marriage, so we are not strangers to this topic. Yet, like anything else, because we have experienced something many times doesn’t dull the emotions of each experience.

We chose to do this move in stages. PHASE 1 was purchasing our retirement home in St Petersburg, Fl. ( actually Kenneth City which sits right next to St Pete ). This past April we closed on our house and our daughter graciously agreed to move in to take care of it for us while we are still in Virginia. Blessings all around.

PHASE 2. Moving some stuff and the dogs to Florida, but returning to finish our jobs.

Our two labs are 12 and 13 and life here with stairs and damp cold is not good for their old bodies so we decided to take them down now and leave them in Florida with our daughter and her dog until we join them in a few month. Barry will return to VA after Thanksgiving to work and I’ll stay with them until early February. Barry will be driving a 12′ Penske truck filled with boxes and a few pieces of furniture and I’ll have the dogs in my car. Three days on the road to make it easier for sure.

We have been blessed with an exception dog walker who is now like family. Saying that good bye this week will be difficult


Lessons Learned from Phases One and Two:

1.Starting early is good. We had no idea that we could actually have two houses at one time. I’m even in the Real Estate business and didn’t know how to make all of this happen but sought wise counsel and decided it was a great way to go to eliminate the stress of selling and buying simultaneously. I have gone through that many times with clients and it’s very stressful. Because we are packing ourselves we started that early as well. It was a good time to purge and decide what we really needed to keep.

2. Talk to each other about what the next phase will look like. For us it means not working full time and so being together a lot more than we have ever been. If you, like me, are very different than your spouse this conversation is super important. We have engaged on this topic many times over the past year or so and it’s really been helpful. What are the ‘expectations’ we have for ourselves and each other? Do we keep a ‘schedule’ or just enjoy each day as it comes? Now we are both more available how do we divide up the daily tasks? There was much to discuss and more will come up, but we at least have a lot figured out. For many of you reading this blog this topic may be more of a discussion about employment or children etc. but have the conversations.

3. Stay rested, keep a good attitude and communicate.  For me fatigue is always the KILLER of a good attitude. If I don’t get enough rest I’m a ‘not nice’ person. Relationships are more important than ‘to do’ lists so remember to stay connected even when the focus is on getting things done. Make time for your family and your friends and pace yourself.

4. Make this an opportunity to bless others. When you purge think about who might benefit from you donating stuff to a person or a charity. We used to give friends in our leaving location something special from our ‘stuff’ …sometimes a set of dishes that reminded us of meals shared together. Sometimes a special picture or small piece of furniture.

Next entry will be our phase in Florida from November – Early February. I’m sure there will be lots of great times and many more lessons learned. Come along if you wish…..



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